wrap up.

So when Steven was first at college I began using a computer program called myspace to keep tabs with him. Well that program soon went south and facebook took its place. Facebook allows you to keep a little profile of yourself and interact with others. Little did I know how much I would use this program. It is now used by businesses and in particular our school. We discuss points, share articles, its really quite helpful.

One of the aspects I really enjoy is the updates. People post a sentence or two about what they are doing and it is sent to all the people who follow their profile. Today I used an application that made a collage of a random assortment of my posts throughout the year. It was actually quite a nice wrap up. Other than the lack of baby mention, it gives a pretty good synopsis to my year.

alien.

The pain in my leg lasted about 3 days this time and thankfully has passed. What has not passed is the movement. Good night, it is a strange feeling to have your whole mid-section writhing. I admit there are many times when I whip up my shirt and just stare at the wriggling in amazement. It is truly awesome. I jokingly chide Anyara for her constant motion as it wakes me up early on the weekends. I confess I am getting excited to meet her.

Normally I do not allow myself to look forward to things, as it often results in disappointment. In fact, hope in a positive outcome is not one of my strengths. S confessed to me that he is fearful of something bad happening with the baby, and I was happy to hear him say it as I have been also running 1,000 different scenarios through my own head. I want to believe that everything will be ok, but I can't help wondering if we are still able to keep this dream alive. Even though the first one isn't out yet, we are already thinking of the next and hoping Anyara is brilliant. I am so anxious to be a mother, to have our family, and this is another one of those things that is out of my hands and solely in Gods. Seems to be a place we are in a lot lately.

other side.

I have pain on my right hip/pelvis area that makes me wince when I move. It also causes me to limp like a wounded duck down the hall at school causing people to wince in my honor. I move like I am 80. My sciatic nerve is apparently on the fritz.

A and B lost their second baby to miscarriage. T and his wife are doing the ovulation dance, and B and T are taking a break after their 5th attempt at invitro.

Our "baby room" has so much work left, the vents aren't working so it is freezing, the carpet needs to be ripped out, and so much detail work is left to be done. I am the size of a small house, and I don't forsee my life to be one where the baby weight falls off. Both families are getting closer and closer as the long awaited child gets closer and closer. Sometimes that is good, other times I worry for my ability to make the choices that I want for my family. Three baby showers loom in the month of January, but none of them ensure that we will have what we need.

And yet, I am so unbelievably happy. So happy that we are pregnant, that we can be. That today I got to hear her heartbeat at my 30 week appointment, that she shakes my belly with her constant movement. I am so happy, we are so blessed.

soccer player.

So it is Thanksgiving morning and I am awake due to the over excited flailings of my daughter. She is ACTIVE. But I must say, being awoken on a potential sleep in day is nothing. I keep thinking about how miserable it was waiting and hoping to get pregnant, and I just can't believe how blessed we are to be in our 7th month. I am having a great pregnancy so far, and I can't tell if that is because I have had less trouble spots than others (back pain, leg cramps . . .) or if I am just so happy to be pregnant, that I don't mind as much about the discomforting parts. I feel really happy and content right now and it is a great feeling.

On a not as content feeling, I am attempting two desserts for my parents today as Aunt M will not be coming. The first is a pumpkin cake with cream cheese frosting that I got from a co-worker. Really simple, but really good. The other is a double-layer chocolate torte that M made for me on my birthday. M is a great explorer of new recipes and will often bring her experiments in to school to test them out on the 4th grade team. This recipe, however was AMAZING. Somewhere in the back of my head, I believed I could make this very complicated dessert- and yesterday was not my day for baking. The trial run of the mousse layer, that I had done earlier in the week, did not influence my attempt yesterday as the mousse was ridiculously off. Also the simple pumpkin cake, which looked done, revealed that it was not after cooling for 15 minutes. Which meant that it needed to be remade as well. sigh. I did take a moment or two to swear at the top of my lungs yesterday- which helped a little. The second attempt of the mousse yesterday, went much better, as did the cake. So today, I am going to pop a frozen apple pie into the oven to bring to S's dad's, make the cream cheese frosting for the pumpkin cake, and whip cream to put on the torte. Let's hope I don't mess those up!

Host and Hostess.

So . . . . WE DID IT! S and I got the house fixed up and held the first ever get together at our house. We cleaned and repaired like crazy people- CRAZY people to get ready and it all came together last night. I made Paula Dean's pulled pork recipe, Martha Stewart's mac and cheese and the Neely's apple crisp. We had chips and beans, and A brought Aloo Pie. I made all of the food and it went over very well.

Beyond the food prep, we had about 12 people who jelled really well and who are typically pretty zen. People grabbed what they needed, and there was not one issue with keeping an eye on anyone. Everyone who came was family or dang near.

It feels like overnight we had gone from a shack with another shack in the back, to a beautiful house with a finished garage. It is truly amazing. I awoke today to a organized house and a feeling of calm I haven't had in a long time. It feels really good to be here. To have friends and family over to our house was one of the missing pieces. I am so glad we found it!

replaced.

So I have been in a little of a head spin lately trying to find a replacement for my maternity leave. K, the principal, hired someone on as a building EA and said if I liked them, they could work for my maternity leave. Well I tried, but nothing worked out. She couldn't manage the class and make it work so I was stuck looking for alternatives. I found one through the special ed EA that I really like in my room. She recommended a friend, I watched her teach, I fell in love.

Not only can she teach, and she can manage small ones, she can manage MY small ones. It was amazing. I showed her to the principal, and he said it was good to go. So now I am ready, more than the nursery, more than the registry, this is one thing on my list I really wanted to get done. Now I know my class will be in good hands. sigh.

On a completely unrelated note, we are hosting our first ever party at our house, dinner, dessert, fire and booze. . . . .I am a little nervous to get all the stuff done that must be done, but I am sick of never having anyone over. So Saturday we will celebrate S and St's birthday come hell or high water- but I am seriously hoping to avoid either of those . . .

On a really unrealated note, Anyara could not be kicking/punching/hitting/flailing anymore than she already is. The belly is out in full force people, watch me grow!

Just kicking it.

So for weeks I have been trying to get S to feel the pulsing in my stomach. As each week passes, it seems more and more obvious to me, but so far there has been no luck. Last night as we were going to bed were were doing our traditional day close- take the vitamins, good thing-selfish thing-and good thing about S. As we finished chatting about the day he reached over and as he adjusted his cuddle position to feel the belly before we prayed, she did this huge kick. I asked him if he had felt anything, and his eyes just lit up. I rotated to the right side, where she seems to kick a lot at night, and he was able to feel a lot more thumping.

It was so cool to finally share that moment with him. Truly cool and special. Baby is on her way!