SAFE. . . . oh wait.

So last week was our 12 week appointment, we checked it out and all was good. We both told our works the next day. We told my parents this weekend before our trip with them to Olivia for the annual Corn Days. They were pretty excited. And I was pretty excited to be able to tell people why I was so tired and chunky.

Last night (Sunday night) I was in the kitchen dishing up supper when I felt some wetness between my legs. I lifted up my skirt to find blood. We were both a little shaken to say the least. I went and sat down and we called the doctor. The bleeding, which was a very small amount, let up as I sat. The concern was the color- bright red. I spent some interesting moments last night just trying not to move as we tried to figure out what was going on. S was pretty wound up, but I was more fearful. I don't worry about stuff like that- it is already done. Either the baby was ok or it wasn't. Not much we could do at that point. I prayed for God's guidance either way and tried to let it go. I had a little more bleeding when I moved upstairs, but nothing the doctor warned us to come in for. The blood this morning was all dark brown so I felt better. Whatever happened last night seemed to be healing.

However, the doctor said to go in today for an ultrasound to make sure things were ok. Today was the first day of Anya's new daycare as well as the first day of the second session of summer school. There was so much that I needed to do, and so much of it was really physical. Hauling Anya and her things, moving boxes and fabric into my classroom. It just seemed daunting. I still felt a little weak, but I managed. Everything worked out fine and we got the day rolling. The only hiccup was that the scheduling office doesn't open until 8:30, but that is when class starts! So I moved some things around and made the only appointment I could, at 10:10. This time was a huge pain/blessing. Pain because it was right in the middle of the school day and I have a lot to teach on the first day. And now I would have to explain to people why I needed to leave. All fun. The blessing part was now I didn't have to lug/fight/entertain Anya through the doctors office or mess up her nap.

The ultrasound showed a healthy kicking baby. The heartbeat is fine. No tearing or bleeding. All is good. I called S to share and then went to pick up Anya. There was a little crying when I dropped her off, but she seemed so happy when I picked her up. Things were calm, there was no tv and I got a super detailed note about her day. RELIEF.

I am still feeling wonky. Tired and weak and unsure of my body. All of which are not my favorite. But there are some positive things for sure. Just need to keep going and figure out what is next.