Not ready to back down

So my mom has been insane lately.
I mean more than usual.

My mom and I never really got on too well, but we found this really great middle ground where I don't ask anything from her, take care of myself, and pretend like she is a part of my life. It works - or had been.

But now, with the addition of the wedding - everything has changed - all bets are off and I am left complete confused about what I should do. My mom is angry with me. She is rude and biting with me, which may not seem like a lot, but from my mom it is. My mom is the most passive, passive-aggressive, pouty woman I know. She has never in my life treated me the way she does now. Besides daily pleasantries, she rarely actually spoke to me at all - hardly knew me. But now she is forceful and direct in speech.

insane.

For 26 years I have developed a pride in not relying on my mom. For anything. I comfort myself, I figure it out, I seek out my own answers. And it is this routine that she wants to break. For this wedding she wants to be a mom again - to be a mom to me.

And I can't abide it - can't make peace with it. I know I should make the effort and allow her this. But it eats at me. Why should I let her pretend that I haven't needed her? That her neglect didn't hurt? Why should I?

Logic says - to be a better person - to move on- to end it - forgive. Problem is I'm just not there yet. Or maybe I don't want to. yet.